See What God Has Done

When we first arrived at our post in Costa Rica, I was invited to lunch with some epic missionary moms. The festive atmosphere turned gray when one of the moms surprised us with the news that her family was leaving the post and missions altogether. When she went into reasons that were certainly valid, they deeply pierced my heart. There is no doubt that we do sacrifice a whole lot when we say yes to this life, and it is no less true for our children. I left the luncheon questioning our decision to leave it all for Jesus, mostly because of the difficulties for our kids. My eyes welled up as I recognized at that moment the gravity of missions for her children and wondered what would be in store for ours.

As another mom and I were driving home, we kept quiet. Saying goodbye is the most difficult aspect of life, missions or otherwise. Then, all of a sudden, this veteran mission momma shared her heart with me about her reasons for staying in the field with her children; concrete ways God provided, blessed, and guided her children to holiness and happiness. I regained my composure and felt uplifted from the dark pit I was certainly crawling into just moments before. I went home to share the news with our family and eventually shared my anxious heart with our Lord in prayer.

Admittedly, there have been times in missions where I am up in the middle of the night questioning this life, not just for me, but for our children. Why are THEY called here? We were doing well in our own community in South Carolina. Our kids had friends, they were involved with sports, we had a great school, our parish community still helps us to thrive in our faith, and our extended family is amazing… What were we thinking? Even now, as we are taking a sabbatical in the States before returning to our post, the thoughts of uncertainty return.

And just like the day with the other epic missionary momma, our patient Lord reveals to me how He has already moved in all of our lives, and how He is trustworthy.

“When God calls you and your husband, He’s not just calling you. He is calling your children as well.”

I recall my first conversation with Mr. Frank, co-founder of FMC, who must have noticed my anxiety. He confidently told me, “When God calls you and your husband, He’s not just calling you. He is calling your children as well.”

Well, let’s just see what God’s actually done…

First, God has provided excellent mentors and friends for our kids. I am mostly referring to single and married missionaries and their missionary children. There is a particular strength in what they have found in these beautiful souls. The single missionaries have allowed my children to see that following Jesus is actually amazing and cool. They encourage them, allow them to have freedom to just be themselves, and witness to them a life of virtue, sacrificial love, and acceptance. These are life lessons that really take a village to help form. MANY memories have been made with these amazing souls who are now family to us. Through these memories and with the help of technology, all the missionary kids connect and grow together like cousins. This doesn’t replace our family at home; it accentuates it. We are super grateful for the relationships that have continued to grow over the past five years in missions.

Secondly, God has fulfilled the desires of our children’s hearts. Where there was anxiety, He has shown them that He could be trusted, and that nothing is accomplished on our own accord.

Our oldest, who graduated high school last Spring, has what I consider the most blatant blessings. He has always wanted to play American football, and tried to bargain with us to make sure we were out of missions in time for him to play at the local high school back in the States. To our surprise, we found the only American football league in Costa Rica (a minor league) at a time where we were supposed to go back and where he just so happened to be old enough to play. Not only did he get to play, but his team was undefeated and they won the championship his first year. This is all great, but remember, he has had amazing single missionaries who helped him have no fear in sharing his light on and off the field. While the football scene has a lot of suggestive language and anger, we saw our son encourage, uplift, and be a model witness of Christ’s love. The boy took the advice, “Let your actions speak for you,” to heart. Could he have done this in the States? Sure. Yet, we can see Costa Rica is where he needed to be for God to literally show him all things are possible when we trust in Him.

God has fulfilled the desires of our children’s hearts. Where there was anxiety, He has shown them that He could be trusted, and that nothing is accomplished on our own accord.

Our middle child is quiet but seriously social. He had reservations about being in missions because he didn’t want to be the “weird kid” in the crowd. He was worried he wouldn’t be able to fully connect with people. I am proud to say that out of all of us, he has gained the gift of language best, and he has certainly connected with people that the rest of our family could not reach. One of his best friends, who we will respectfully (and accurately) call Eddie, (taken from the classic show “Leave it to Beaver”) is at our house at least twice a week and joins our ministry quite often. He is considered part of the family. Not just ours, but our entire missionary community as well.

This year, our middle child celebrated Confirmation at our post, and we were blessed to host a magnificent party attended by many of the people we serve and grow with. It was a powerful testimony of how much our boy is loved. Again, our son could have received this beautiful sacrament in the States, but we believe this was truly where he needed to be. The fruit of his presence in Costa Rica was well represented. As we enter into our sabbatical this fall, I have already noticed this young man’s calendar filling up. There is no doubt that he connects well with others and, like our oldest child, God has given him the desires of his heart as a vibrant community rallies around him in all parts of the world.

Our youngest child began this journey when he was two years old. If you ask any FMC parent, you would hear that kids make the best missionaries. There is definitely truth to that. Children in general make people “go soft” inside. Smiles and giggles and touch are usually in store if the child is small enough, and our littlest one is no exception. People just wanted to touch his hair, call him guapo (handsome), and want him to say something—anything. Our shy child came back to the States after the first year pretty confident in himself as most people saw and treated him like a star. This has only accelerated over time as our shy little boy has become witty, courageous, and probably a little too comfortable in any environment.

Recently, our youngest shared his dream to become an altar server. Not long after, our priest personally invited our youngest to serve with him at Mass. Our little guy PROUDLY accepted that invitation, and with the guidance of his older brothers, has served in our local church in Santa Rosa ever since. He even had the privilege to serve with the bishop during our middle child’s Confirmation and he has helped his brothers with altar server training in our community.

I am not negating the fact that there are struggles in missions for our children. There have been tears, exhaustion, aggravation, and frustrations with language, culture, people, and food. They have terribly missed their old home, our family, friends, and our animals, whom we left. However, when I lament this to our Lord in prayer, He always gives me peace as He guides me to see that, for our family, at this time, this is exactly where we are invited to be.

And Mr. Frank was right: God called our children. He called them not just for the benefit of the community wherever we are, but for our family, and most importantly, for themselves. How grateful we truly are to our Lord who can be trusted in this most beautiful call to missions.